what I learned this morning

I love the times when I pick up my Bible to read, and something stands out to me, as if for the first time.  I've had lots of questions rolling around in my head lately, about decisions to make, even about people around me.  I have a tendency to second-guess myself, so when I opened up to James this morning to read about taming my tongue, my eyes fell on another passage.

What I read was in James three, the same chapter, but a different subject.  It was about wisdom.

In James one, he tells us that wisdom is ours for the taking.  All we have to do is ask for it, then believe and not doubt that God has supplied us with it.

In chapter three, he talks of two kinds of wisdom~the kind that is from heaven and the kind that is not.  I don't know about you, but I don't want the kind that is not from Him~from heaven.  That kind of wisdom is earthly, unspiritual and of the devil.  I don't want to harbor bitter envy or selfish ambition in my heart.  I think we all can tend to be this way, too, so it's a struggle to work against that temptation.  (Social media is a good example of this~why, really, do I post what I post?  Is it for selfish ambition?  To make people like me more?  Lord, if it is, then please forgive me! This is thought-provoking stuff.)

I do want the kind of wisdom that is from the Lord~from heaven, the kind that is first of all pure (not self-seeking), then peace-loving (not quarrelsome, not turmoil-causing or loving), considerate (not selfish), submissive (not bossy, or that wants or needs to be right all the time), full of mercy and good fruit (not holding grudges, but showing plenty of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control), impartial and sincere (not put-on).

That is the kind that I asked for today.  After reading those verses, it was clear that I didn't have wisdom on some things because I wasn't asking for wisdom on those things.  After times like this morning, I feel like I had a coffee date with Jesus.  He might as well have been sitting right beside me at the kitchen table.  It was suddenly so clear that I just needed to pray.  If I spent even half the time in prayer that I spend thinking about things, mulling them over, getting opinions of other people, then there would not be this struggle I so often face.

I've written this before recently (I think), but I am once again reminded of the hymn that says, "Oh what peace we often forfeit, oh what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry, everything to the Lord in prayer."  That's from What A Friend We Have In Jesus.  Sometimes we just need a reminder to do that~to pray.

And here are the verses that I decided to commit to memory after reading them for the seemingly

thousandth time this morning.

They are from James 3: 13 through 18.

Who is wise and understanding among you?  Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. 

Such wisdom does not come from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil.

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.  

Praise God that His word sets out to do what it accomplishes~it never returns to Him void.

Love to all.

thoughts

You know that feeling you get when you feel like your heart connects with someone else's?  Yeah.  Not in a weird way, but maybe in the way you feel about your husband, or a sister, or a friend who you feel like should be a sister.  I feel that more and more, the older I get.

Well, kinda.  In a way, I feel it less and less.

I totally just contradicted myself, I know, but let me explain.

The older I get, the more I connect on a heart level with the friends Jesus has given me.  I am older, so I choose my friends more wisely than I ever have before.  I tend to bend toward people who are similar to me in their faith, in their morals, and in the way they live their life.

Because of those things I've listed, my circle of friends has become increasingly small.  I mean, it's okay~I am so blessed to have such precious women in my life, but the older I get, the more narrowed down that list becomes.

I guess I'm more "on purpose" now than I ever have been before.

It seems like the longer I live on this earth, the shorter our time gets.  I have changed~the things that used to keep me going and the things I was all about are different now.  I also tend to take after my dad, and I have a serious side to me that comes out more with age.

All that being said, I am so thankful for the women in my life.  (I am thankful for MUCH more than just this, but it's what I'm choosing to write about tonight.)  I feel like I have the greatest friends in the whole world...and I do.  I love being with like-minded women.  I also love when they don't mind that I love to show affection.  I know that sounds weird, but I am extremely affectionate, and not everyone is.  I have a couple friends who totally get this side of me, and they are the same way.  One of my best friends Christa is one such lady~she is affectionate as well, so she gets it.

I got to spend time with such ladies today...and teenagers.  Most of my life revolves around these two groups of people~the Lord has given me such a strong love for them.  Some awesome ladies and myself took some of our youth to the zoo today.  The whole city of Memphis was there, too.  ;)  It was so much fun, though and I am glad we went.

I love teenagers, not because I'm crazy, but because Jesus made me fall in love with them a year and a half ago.  I don't know how to express my love for them, except to tell you that I just do.  I did not have anybody to talk to when I was a teenager, and I am so grateful to be even a tiny part of their lives today.  If I can invest time into just one girl to keep her from making the same mistakes that I made as a young girl, it will all be worth it.  I don't consider myself a "teacher" of these girls, but I can facilitate a conversation, and I faithfully pray for all of them.  I challenge them in their faith and I encourage them to spend time reading God's word.  I also challenge them to memorize Scripture, because who doesn't need to do that?

I love them.  I pray that they always know this about me, and how much I love each and every one of them.  I help out in two groups on Sunday~the eleventh grade girls Bible Fellowship class and with the tenth and ninth grade community group on Sunday night.  This is my second year in being actively involved with them, and I love every single minute.  I know it sounds crazy, because I'm a boy mom, but when I'm with them for a while and then I come back home, I miss them.  They're amazing.

I mainly know the girls, but I know some of the guys too.  They all astound me every time I'm with them.  These are some of  the most thoughtful, Christ-minded people I have ever known.  Today was fun, and I'm glad I was able to spend my afternoon with them (AND one of my most favorite people ever on this earth, Abbey, the one who is every bit as affectionate as I am).

This is Nancy, a girl from our Bible Fellowship class.  Abbey's face in the background kills me~I posted this on Instagram and she commented about her face that this is the way she felt about this entire day.  Bless her.

Drew is such a turkey.  Left to right are Abigail, Katie, Drew, Kathryn, and Maia.  They're all in my community group on Sunday night.

These next two pictures are from last night~my sweet friend Scottie had us over for a scary movie night.

We watched Insidious 1 and 2.  Scottie is the one I am privileged to be with every week in our Bible Fellowship class.  She's pretty awesome.  Her daughter is Katie, and her and Drew are the ones who set this whole night up.  It was Graham's and Drew's first time to watch a scary movie.

I took this on the sly while we had a small break between the first and second movie.  We were over there until almost midnight last night, but it was so fun!  And those movies were awesome.

Well, now that I've talked your ear off, I guess it's time for me to get off this computer.  I hope all of you had a great day!  Love to all.

Happy Monday! A little bit of a weekend wrap-up and some advice...for anyone who wants some. If not, then keep on scrolling.

Wow.  That might have been the longest title ever in the history of blog titles.  This is also post number one thousand six hundred and something.  I suppose I've had a lot to say over the past six years.

Our weekend was wonderful.  I've become somewhat of a homebody, and I've recently begun to love our Friday nights at home when I actually cook something for dinner.  I used to be of the mindset that I had survived the week, so surely that meant we could order out for dinner, right?  Or go out...which would be even better.  But in the past few weeks, I've been cooking on these nights.  I've even started looking forward to this~and maybe I'll start using this particular night as a night to try something new and yummy.

Sounds good to me!  This past Friday night I made something called Beer Cheese Joes.  If you want the recipe, click on that recipe name and you can try it for yourself.  It was super easy to make and delicious to eat.  I'm thinking the next time I make it, it's going to be served over hot baked potatoes.

Saturday was our eighteenth anniversary, and we had a wonderful dinner that night to celebrate.  We went to our local Italian restaurant on the square, and it did not disappoint.

I only wish it had been a little more of an intimate setting.  We were in a room with other people on either side of us.  In fact, we spent most of our time listening to the conversations going on around us.  It was hard to not listen in and we laughed a couple times, over funny things they did or said.  It was a fun night out.  I love that our boys are all older now...it makes going out so much easier.  The days of finding a sitter or having someone come sit with them are long gone.  I'm kinda glad, to be honest.  I wouldn't trade these ages for all the money in the world.  

Yesterday was an awesome day at church.  I love our girls so much that it hurts.  I love how the Lord has given me a heart for these precious teenage girls.  I was the one who taught our lesson yesterday, and we had such a sweet time of talking and sharing during the lesson.  We even had a girl visit with another girl, and she was a plethora of information about what we were discussing.  I love days like that, when everything just flows.  I always leave with a full and happy heart.  

So the advice part of this is something I've been thinking about for a while.  We have a marriage that has definitely had its ups and downs, but our good stuff far outweighs our bad stuff.  We've learned a thing or three hundred over the last eighteen years, some by rote and some by hard lessons.  I thought I would share a little of what I've learned.

~A husband desires respect from his wife.  There are verses in the Bible that tell husbands to love their wives and wives to respect (and submit to) their husbands.  You can find those in Ephesians 5 and 1 Peter 3.  

~A wife can set the tone for her entire household simply by the words she says and the tone of voice she uses.  I often pray that my words build others up, and that they not tear anyone down.  That is found in Ephesians 4:29.  

~A husband will be glad to help out a wife who is always kind to him.  If I need for Todd to do something for me, I am careful to consider how I've treated him lately.  (Trust me~I have learned these things the hard way.  There have been many, many times when I've had to apologize to him for things I've said.)

~A husband loves to be greeted with excitement when he comes home.  I almost always greet him home with a kiss.  The boys are always so excited when Dad comes home, too, which is something that hasn't gone away with age.  I don't bombard him with complaints or tasks when he walks in the door.  He has a routine that he loves to go by when he comes home~he reads the mail, he takes off his boots, he comes and sits down in the living room while I finish up getting dinner ready.  I respect that~his day is always long and he deserves some down time.

~A husband and wife should always guard their hearts, minds and mouths.  You will never hear me talking negatively about my husband in a public setting.  You will also never hear me demeaning him in any way.  I literally get sick to my stomach when I hear wives complain about their husbands in public, or when they make them seem dumb or ignorant.  Do you know how fast that will turn a marriage sour?  I've walked away from conversations like these, because I don't want to be a part of them.  

I use these verses above as a guideline for that last one.  They're found in Proverbs 4.  

~Husbands and wives should not have close friends of the opposite sex.  I'm not saying "friends", I'm saying "close friends", like the kind they would confide in.  It's too tempting to tell all your problems to someone who will listen.  I am very careful with how I am around other men, and I always pray that the Lord helps me to remember to guard my heart.  

~I am also very careful about the books I read and the shows I watch.  I am a firm believer that things like that put unhealthy thoughts in your head.  Please don't see that as condemnation from me~this is just a very personal conviction that I have to be super careful of what I read and watch.  

With all these things that I've said, know this: we are not perfect.  Our marriage was a complete and total mess for a couple of years.  We were selfish, we did things or acted in a way that we both regret and our hearts were deceitful.  There are lots and lots of things we have learned that work for us.  One thing we never worry about is if our kids witness us bickering.  I hate to say "fight", because even though we do have our moments of growth opportunity, it rarely turns into yelling or dragging it out.  The boys know that we are human and they've witnessed us during these moments.  We always make sure that they know we've apologized to one another and I always talk about it with them the next day.  I always tell them that divorce is never an option for us, and they have nothing to worry about.  (I always used to worry about that when I was a young girl.)   

We are not perfect parents, either.  We have had to say "I'm sorry" to our kids many, many times.  I thank God for moments that keep me humble, and I keep my eyes firmly fixed on Him.  I stay in His word every single day, and I have quality prayer time with Him.  By doing those things, Jesus gives me the strength and the knowledge and wisdom I need to be the wife and mom in the family He has entrusted me with.  I thank Him for the trials, because they develop my perseverance that James 1 talks about.

He is my everything, and I am grateful that I have a Savior.  If I had to do life without Him in it, I would be a train wreck.  I still am, most days, but He gives me what I need to make it through.  

I know this was long...but I pray the words reach the right person.  Love to all.  

eighteen things I love about him

Today is our eighteenth wedding anniversary, so in honor of that, I wanted to share eighteen things I love about my man.

1.  He is kindhearted.

2.  He is a hard worker.

3.  He is handsome, and gets more so with each passing year.

4.  I love his laugh, and how easily it comes.

5.  I love his hands and how strong they are.

6.  He has always been a hands-on dad.  He plays with them, whether it's poker, or the game they're all into on their devices or phones, or a friendly competitive game of Pickle out in the front yard.

7.  He makes sure the boys treat me like a lady.  He taught them at a very young age to always open doors for ladies.  So many times on Sunday, they've gotten "stuck" playing door holder.

8.  I love the gray that I see threaded through his hair nowadays.  It's a sign that we're growing old together.

9.  I love, love, love his voice...especially late at night when I'm sleepy.  He has the ability to talk me to sleep.

10.  I love that he randomly brings me flowers.

11.  I saw his caretaker side after I had surgery, and it was a whole new facet of his personality that came out.  He was super sweet and gentle and worrisome.

12.  He loves to give hugs.

13.  He adores my mother.  He calls her "darlin'".  It melts my heart every single time.

14.  I love that he still gives me butterflies.

15.  He encourages me to get out of the house, whatever that may look like.  Sometimes it'll be on a Saturday with my mom or on a Friday night with my best friend.

16.  He appreciates me.

17.  I love the fact that we are seamless.  I don't know where his dreams for the future end and mine begin.  We share the same loves and we look forward to the same things.  And it's fun to dream together.  We've always done that, even from our dating days.  We used to drive around and look at houses together all the time.

18.  He's my lobster (You have to have watched Friends to get that.).  My best friend.  His face is more familiar to me than my own, and I love every scratch and scar on it.  I look forward to many, many more years together.  

Happy anniversary, Toddley.

Friday Favorites

I love Friday.  It's the last day of the week, my dad comes over, my house gets all straightened up for the weekend, and usually some fun plans are on the agenda.  This day and weekend are no exception.

Here are my top favorites from this week.

One.

Orange rolls and turkey bacon.  This was our breakfast yesterday before our homeschool group.  I know it's not the healthiest of things to eat, but we don't always indulge like we did yesterday.  And orange rolls?  Yes, please.  I love them.  The boys love them.  Todd does not, he prefers cinnamon rolls.  It's been at least a year since we've had these little lovelies.  And our turkey bacon was really good and crispy.  I cooked it in the microwave on some trays that my mom-in-love just sent home with Todd this week.  I love how crispy it makes the bacon!

Two.

We'll Always Have Paris, by OPI.  This was the polish I wrote about in yesterday's blog post.  It's kinda a deep blackish-purple.  I love it.  :)  This was the first dark nail polish I ever bought, almost five years ago.  I used to hate the darker colors, but one day I decided to try some on, and I've loved them ever since.  I only wear the dark colors like this in the fall and winter months...unless it's summer and I'm sick of the bright stuff.  ;)

Three.

Spotify, the app.  My teenagers introduced me to this app over the summer and I love it.  I listen to it multiple times during the week, like if I'm sitting in the living room writing on this blog and I don't want the television to be turned on.  (I am actually watching tv at this moment~The Today Show.)  I took this screen shot of my phone on Wednesday.  I was listening to Kristian Stanfill at that moment.  The thing I love about the app is that you can search and listen to music by artist.  So I listened to thirty minutes, give or take, of Kristian Stanfill at that time.  There are genres that you can choose from, but I love the worship stuff.

Four.

My mom gave me this lamp several years ago...and I cannot remember what it is called, but it makes me really, really happy.  I've had it on our computer desk for at least a year now, so I decided to pull it out and move it into my kitchen when I was re-purposing things in my home on Wednesday.  There are little charms you can hang from the neck of the lamb, and in this picture I have a heart and a cross hanging on it.  Isn't it sweet?  I also love the light it shines in my kitchen.  I was trying to clear off the clutter on my counters this week, but you can see that I still have stuff sitting out.  I really love my counter stuff, so for now, it's staying.  I did move things around and de-clutter some of the junky areas.

Five.

I love the new room arrangements that took place last week.  When Jonah and Noah got the added floor space in their room, they put Noah's mini-trampoline in one corner.  Yes, it's Noah's~he bought it with some money he had saved.  Sitting on the trampoline are these giant teddy bears that Noah purchased from Costco two years ago.  Are you seeing a theme?  Noah buys stuff for multiple people to enjoy.  He even bought Jonah his own teddy bear.  Since last week, Crash has made this his new bed every night.  He loves to sleep with the boys, and this way, he feels like he's with them, but he's not taking up their entire bed.  This dog is so rotten!  He has a really, really good life.  They love him sleeping in their room each night, and honestly, so do I.  That is what having a dog is all about, and is exactly what Todd wanted for all the boys.  Sometimes before Crash settles in for the night, he'll go into Graham's and Drew's room and hang out on Graham's bed for a while, but he always ends up back in the laps of these teddy bears.  :)

Well.  That wraps up some of my favorite things from this week.  I am linking up with Momfessionals again for this post.  I hope you have a great day!  Love to all.

a list of random things

I know you probably couldn't care less, but last Thursday my friend and I were talking about fall nail polish colors, and I came home and re-polished my nails.  That polish was absolutely flawless from Thursday all the way until Tuesday.  I am not even joking.  The only thing I did different was use a different color~We'll Always Have Paris by OPI~and I added a top coat.  I love having polished nails, but I don't love polishing them.  This makes me happy.  :)

I have written a lot in my journal this week.  I love technology and I love this blog, but sometimes all this technology makes me neglect my love for handwriting.  This week I wrote pages and pages and pages of Scripture, of funny things that happened, of what we were doing in homeschooling and even an October to do list of sorts.

One of the things I love about our homeschool days (there is much) is how much Bible my kids get.  All four of them have written out long passages of Scripture in their notebooks and are supposed to be working on memorizing them.  They've read whole books in the Bible, too, like Esther and Daniel.  Next week we'll be working on reading and writing out the book of James.  Yes, I said "book of James".  I am that mom who believes that even though they hate to write, the more the write, the less they hate.  It really does work, I promise.

It rained here this afternoon.  I adore rainy days, especially when I am able to enjoy it from the comfort of my home.  After our homeschool group, we came home and I changed into my pajamas and called my husband and asked if he could please pick us up a giant pizza from Costco for dinner.  I am craving pizza from there so bad, that I can taste it.  To go with our pizza, I made a big Caesar salad.  I am ready to eat!

I never really eat lunch on Thursday~I don't like to eat that late after our homeschool group, so I might snack on something small, but I usually don't eat.  Which means I am starving by dinner.

I laughed ridiculously hard at this last night.

Ridiculously hard.  I immediately sent the picture in a text to Drew.  Because this is him, almost every single meal.

I think I'm falling apart.  I was sick to my stomach all day Monday and most of Tuesday, but then I felt better when I woke up Wednesday.  All of a sudden, before we left for church yesterday afternoon, I started feeling my neck start to hurt.  Then my head, then down my back and down my arm.  It's my right side, not the left, in case you're concerned I am having a heart attack: I am not, I promise.  It got progressively worse last night, even after eight hundred milligrams of Ibuprofen.  It hurts today, but the pain finally seems to be dimming this afternoon.  I started to go visit a chiropractor today after our homeschool group, but later on I came to the realization that I hurt so bad that I should wait until I'm feeling a little better.  I will have to go next week, but today I would have bawled my eyes out on the table.  I think I slept weird, so I think it's either a crazy crick in my neck, or something pinched in my neck.  I tell you this, because if you see me and I am favoring my right arm, or turn weird to see you, that is why.

I am so excited over a night at home.  And I'm excited that this rain will bring cooler weather tomorrow.  And these next few days.  We might have to break out the fire pit tomorrow night.

On Saturday, my husband and I will celebrate our eighteenth wedding anniversary.  We are leaving these kids at home and going to have dinner at Cafe Piazza here in The Ville.  :)  I might even talk him into coffee afterwards.

Well.  I'm going to go munch on some croutons.  Did I mention how hungry I am?!

Love to all.

what's been happening, Wednesday

Monday was a long day for me.  I didn't sleep all that great in Franklin, so I was exhausted come Sunday night.  I didn't feel good, either, so I spent the whole day laying around.  

I did hang my new cross that I brought home from Franklin.  It's the one on the top right.

And Jonah made his own spice mix.

I love those dimples.  This could totally be a cookbook cover.  I would buy it in a heartbeat.  ;)

Tuesday we went on a field trip.  I am trying to be a more fun homeschool mom this year, and yesterday was a good day to get away from our everyday routine.  More about our routine on another day, though.  We visited replicas of the Nina and the Pinta.

It was really interesting.  And hotter than Hades.  I will be so glad when cool weather gets ushered in this week!

I made them pose.  They LOVE when I do that.

It's a terrible picture because the sun was directly in their eyes.  They have the most sensitive eyes...it's a blue eyed problem.  Mine are that way, too, so anytime we can sunglasses (even in the rain, sometimes), it helps tremendously.

Today has been a long day of school for them.  I am so proud of the way they are managing their time this year.  You have no idea how much of a struggle that was last year, so my prayers have been answered.  They're doing a great job of keeping up with the work load, too.  I had to give them a shout out for their hard work, which is why I was glad to reward them with a fun day trip yesterday.

This morning I was in the mood to decorate, so I spent the majority of my morning in the kitchen cleaning what nobody will ever see and re-purposing.

I plan on doing the same thing Friday morning, but in my living room.  :)  I stole this lamp from in there, so now I need to fill in the gap this left.  I also need another small lamp.

My funny for the week is something that involves Graham.  He came to me Monday morning to tell me he left his chemistry book at school.  I got upset with him and lectured him on being more responsible, then on the way to their work, we went by the church we have our homeschool group at so he could look for it.  He didn't find it, so he emailed his teacher to see if she had picked it up, and asked a friend if he could borrow his book for his work for this week.  Yesterday morning he came to me (after another lecture) to show me that he had found the book on his book shelf.  And then I remembered that I was the one who put it there.  :(  Last week, after class on Thursday, he spent the night with his grandparents, so I unpacked his bag for him.  He told me always just leaves it in his bag so he won't forget it on Thursday's.

I felt really bad.  But I am thankful for moments like these that keep me humble before Jesus and my family.  I am a very flawed human being and I daily ask His forgiveness.  Asking my kids to forgive me is good for them to see, because it shows them that I am desperate for a Savior.  I am so thankful that I have one.

It's been a great past few days.  Praise the Lord that I am feeling so much better...I think I had a stomach bug.  How has your week been?  Feel free to share a funny moment with me!

Love to all.