Tuesday, October 10, 2023

all about us --> our 27th anniversary

 


Happy Tuesday, friends! I failed to mention it last week on my blog, but on October 4th, Todd and I celebrated 27 years of being married. I know that in my brain, but I can't believe it's been that many years! Do you know the feeling of looking into someone's face and theirs being more familiar to you than your own? That's how I feel about my guy. We've known each other since we were in high school, and I love that we can say that we were high school sweethearts. 



I have a few thoughts about married life that I thought I'd share here. 


If you're both believers, Jesus should be at the center of your marriage, and you should both work on that relationship between you and Him both separately and together. I had someone explain it to me like this: picture a triangle with God at the top and the couple each at the bottom. If the wife moves closer to God and the husband stays put, there is more distance between the couple. If the couple moves up closer to God together, they get closer in distance. I have witnessed this so many times! I know it's true.


Don't joke about divorce. It's a serious matter and should be avoided at all costs. 


Lighten up! Laugh easily and often. I think sometimes that if I couldn't laugh at myself, I'd cry. Laughter is so much better!


Don't help him drive. He doesn't need your help. Lean back, settle in, and if necessary, take a nap if he makes you nervous. 🤣 (Did you know that 99% of our fights have taken place in his vehicle?!)


Do not nag! Proverbs talks about a nagging wife often, and how it would be better to live in a corner of an attic with a drippy roof than to live with a nagging wife. You're not the Holy Spirit, so don't try to play that in his life.


Kiss multiples times everyday! Make him feel welcome when he comes home from work and be excited to see him.


Take an interest in what interests him. Encourage his hobbies and enjoy your own. Better yet, enjoy them together! This is why I encouraged Todd to buy a motorcycle. He loves riding on it and hopefully someday I will too! I anticipate us taking short weekend road trips together someday. 


Enjoy being together. Someday everyone will be out of your house and it'll be just the two of you. You'd better like each other to survive the years that follow! I've heard story after story that once the kids leave home, the couple realizes they'd grown apart. 


Take great care with the intimate side of your marriage! It can either help or destroy your marriage, depending on if you take care of that or if you ignore that side of married life. 


Date all that you can! I know it's hard when the kids are little and you have to arrange for them to be watched, but it's worth it. We weren't great at that, but we did still manage to end up okay in spite of that. Even better than dating, plan trips together! They don't have to be for long periods of time or anything fancy, but a night or two away alone is so much fun and worth the effort. 


Accept any and all the help you can get, and when it's done differently than the way you do it, be grateful anyway. (I mean when he helps out around the house.)


Be totally open and honest at all times! Learn how to communicate well. This will save you from lots of fighting if you can extend some insight as to why you're irritated about something. 


Let things go. If you've been in a fight and have apologized, or if a wrong has been to one of you, once the apology has been uttered, let it go and stop overthinking. I am bad at this, at not being able to let things go. I'm better than I used to be, but I'm still a work in progress and will be until the day I die. 


It's been all of twenty-seven years, but on the other hand, it's only been twenty-seven years since we said "I do". Some things we have learned by now, and other things we are still learning. Praise God that He never gives up on us, and He gives us opportunities to grow and learn more together. I look forward to whatever our next phase of life is, whenever it decides to come our way. I've heard it only gets better! Thanks for reading my blog, friends. Love to all! 

14 comments:

  1. Happy Happy Anniversary! Yes when Jesus is at the center of it all, you can't go wrong- wishing you both much health and happiness! XO

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  2. Happy Anniversary …..My brother and his wife filed for divorce after 28 years and I have a good friend who just moved out of her home and has been married for 28 years as well. I have 25 years in and just told my spouse we need to keep it together. It breaks my heart

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  3. Happy anniversary! Marriage is hard but so worth it. I agree with everything you said. It takes nurturing like any other relationship, but needs to be treated even more preciously. I do not have all the answers, of course!

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  4. Thank you, Jen! That is heartbreaking about your brother, his wife, and your friends. I am so sorry! I hear that same kind of thing happening to people I know and I always feel terrible for them, especially since they've already been married for so long.

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  5. Thank you, Amy! You are so right, it takes a lot of work. It's worth it, though!

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  6. Happy (belated) Anniversary!! I am soaking in every little bit of wisdom that you shared! Thank you for the encouragement. Marriage is absolutely worth fighting for, and it's good to be reminded of that.

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  7. Thank you, Leah! I always need these reminders too, I think we all do. I love following encouraging marriage accounts on Instagram too, like Dave and Ashley Willis. If you haven't heard of them, you should check them out!

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  8. Happy Anniversary! What a lovely post. Our friends always comment on how much fun my husband and I have - we take joy in the simplest things like a trip to Home Depot or a stroll exploring a new town. We come from vastly different backgrounds and had major differences in the way we were raised, our outlook on parenting, even things like how to celebrate Christmas. We mastered the art of compromise early and we just celebrated our 30th anniversary earlier this year.

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  9. Thank you, Pamela! I love that about you and your husband. It really is all about the small things in life, right?

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  10. I loved reading this post and happy anniversary to the two of you Jennifer!

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